Lack of sex drive is much more common than it is in men, but it is still something that women find difficult to talk about. Many women still have the ability to achieve orgasm when they do have sex, but the problem lies in a lack of desire to have sex in the first place. Fortunately, libido loss is usually just a temporary thing, and there are a variety of ways to improve it and get your sex life back on track.
Causes of libido loss
A lack of interest in sex can be caused by a number of different physical and psychological factors:
- Changes in oestrogen levels – Ovulating women experience a peak in sex drive just before and after ovulation, but after the menopause ovulation ceases and these increased periods of desire disappear. Menopausal women may also respond less to touch, and find it harder to get aroused. Lower levels of oestrogen also means less blood flow to the vagina, and more dryness, making sex painful.
- Life stress – Juggling a career with raising a family is stressful, and it can be difficult to find time for sex so it often gets pushed to the back of the queue. Avoiding sex then causes tension between you and your partner, further compounding the problem.
- Sexual problems – If you experience an inability to orgasm, pain during sex, or have suffered sexual abuse in the past this can lead to a loss of sexual desire.
- Medical condition – Certain medical conditions can lead to a loss of libido, including arthritis, diabetes, cancer, coronary artery disease, hypertension, thyroid disorders, and neurological diseases.
- Medications – Some prescription medication, including certain antidepressants, beta-blockers, anti-seizure medications, and thyroid treatments are notorious libido zappers.
- Fatigue – Exhaustion from caring for young children, working full time, and running a household can make you feel physically and mentally drained. When fatigue sets in it’s difficult to think of sex.
- Pregnancy and breast feeding – The hormonal changes that your body goes through during and after pregnancy can put a damper on your libido. Changes in body image, and the fatigue of caring for a new baby also contribute to changes in sexual desire.
- Psychological causes – Mental health problems like anxiety and depression, stress, money worries, poor body image, low self-esteem, history of abuse, or previous negative sexual experiences can all affect the desire for sex.
- Relationship issues – For the majority of women, emotional intimacy is a prelude to sexual intimacy. Problems within a relationship, such as lack of connection, unresolved conflicts, poor communication of sexual preferences, and infidelity/breach of trust, can lead to a decreased interest in sex.
How to boost libido
Depending on the cause of your lack of sex drive, there are a range of different methods that can be successful in treating libido loss. One of the key things that you can do above everything is to communicate your problem with your partner and your doctor.
- Hormone therapy – If your loss of libido is due to low levels of oestrogen or testosterone then your doctor will be able to prescribe you a course of hormone therapy to bring your levels back into a normal range.
- Exercise – Taking regular aerobic exercise and strength training can help to increase your stamina, improve your body image, boost your mood, and all of this should help to boost your libido.
- Control stress – Learn how to handle stressful situations better, e.g. through good communication and organisation. When you do get stressed, try different techniques to help you remain calm, such as yoga, meditation, a relaxing bath – anything that makes you feel good and boosts your mood.
- Plan for intimacy – Busy lifestyles make it difficult to recreate the spontaneity of your youth, but setting aside time for intimacy and sex is just as romantic. Make Wednesday nights ‘date night’ and do something special with your partner to build intimacy.
- Spice things up – Many people experience a loss of interest in sex because it has become boring. Introduce something new to the bedroom, whether it’s toys, massage oils, or different positions. Humans crave new experiences so give your body and brain what they want!
- Alternative medicine – Traditional Chinese medicine such as acupuncture or herbal treatments could help to boost your libido. Speak to us here at TCM HealthCare for more information.